Weaning
How Long Should I Breastfeed?
Everyone has different life circumstances.
Considering the health benefits of breastmilk a developing baby, the World Health Organization (WHO) recommends breastfeeding at least until the 2 year mark. While I encourage every mum who desires to breastfeed to do so as long as she has the support and as long as she can, ultimately:
When it comes to a mum & her child’s breastfeeding journey, I say,
everyone and every body is different and has different needs.
A mum & child’s breastfeeding duration is highly personal and should be respected as such.
Why I Breastfed for 3+ Years; What it Took
While I am SO grateful to have breastfed my daughter for 3 years and 4 months, it was not easy. It required immense support from my husband especially in the early postpartum days. Latching was hard and painful as she has a lip tie; even when nursing became second nature, I needed my husband’s help especially when she was sick (i.e. he brought me meals so I could nurse her throughout all her past colds and I do feel providing her with ample breastmilk helped her recover quickly, stay hydrated/nourished, etc). Not to mention the ridicule and comments you get from others (i.e. individuals who have not done research) who discover you’re still breastfeeding your child longer than they see fit… those definitely made the journey rougher than necessary!
Nevertheless, we persisted… because I knew that
The benefits of the liquid gold did not suddenly vanish at 9 months
Our Doctors recommended we continue breastfeeding for 3 years (if possible) to help increase my daughters chances of overcoming some if not all of her food allergies. And God knows I would move mountains to see that become a reality.
Things to Note BEFORE Weaning
Weaning timeline
Babies <1 year: need to be provided formulas or donor milk if breastfeeding ends before their 1 year birthday
Babies >1 year: only when baby is reliably consuming a balanced and diverse diet of 3 meals / day should supplemental milk (i.e. formula / breast milk / donor milk) be discontinued — consult a nutrition consultant like myself if you would like to discuss exactly how many oz a baby should be supplementing with as every baby’s circumstance is unique
If breastfeeding beyond the 2 year mark:
be sure that mum is nourished (i.e. load up on DHA/quality seafood/cod liver oil, vitamin D / sunshine, calcium, and more)
set strong boundaries to protect yourself from those who claim your breastmilk is useless at that point. (It definitely continues to provide baby with beneficial nourishment and continues to have immune supporting properties.)
Intentionally schedule in some “self care” time where mum can tend to herself with walks outside, yoga, massages, or whatever it is that she needs to experience rest.
What Weaning Looked Like for US
For us, weaning has been gradual. I breast fed on demand from day one and only held back on nursing my child with the assistance of a Lactation Consultant in order to diminish my supply (oversupply was an extremely painful and difficult hurdle for me to overcome in the early postpartum days). That means I pumped and donated when the pressure was too intense instead of offering her the boob to relieve the pressure. Allowing her to suckle all day only led to an increase of my milk supply because milk supply is very much “supply & demand”.
When she hit her 3rd birthday, I decided I needed to wean her as she was well nourished via solid foods and the 3 year mark was a personal goal I set for us in the hopes that it would help her overcome her food allergies.
Since Emma had been reliably eating a nutrient dense diet balanced with 3 meals a day and snacks in between, I was confident that she was ready to wean. Thankfully, she understood when I explained to her that my body needed more rest at night - waking up to let her nurse while we shared the bed was not that hard, but I needed unbroken sleep. I explained to her that the milk bar was essentially closed when the sun was down and during the day I would distract her with activities and snacks when she wanted to nurse for comfort. Gradually, the feeds became less and less during the day.
Currently, we are down to a 2 minute night feed before bed. She asks me to set a timer and when the alarm sounds, she unlatches and puts herself to sleep beside me. I am so proud of her. I am so proud of us.
Why I need to wean her in 1 week
Unfortunately, I was ill-informed on the day my daughter arrived March 2020 with an, “I don’t see why you need to take your prenatal anymore since your baby is out!” I was not nourishing myself with the specific nutrients I needed as a solely breastfeeding mum; for the first 6 months postpartum I was far from hitting the mark of a nutrient dense postpartum diet. I just ate ”healthy” and a lot of whatever satiated me. Yet, my body and bones ached. My milk supply was thriving, but my health was declining.
A Note for Postpartum Mums
Hey, Postpartum / Pregnant Mums, if you decide to breastfeed please do not discontinue your “Prenatal” Multivitamin unless you are regularly consuming some of the world’s more nutrient dense foods (i.e. grass fed or pasture raised liver, lots of raw milk, and dozens of pasture-raised eggs)
I Did Not Consider Specific Nutrient Needs while Breastfeeding: Here’s what happened
My dental health particularly took a hard hit - a breastfeeding mum’s body prioritizes nourishing her milk for her baby to the point that it will draw from mum’s bones and nutrient supply to ensure that baby gets everything it needs if mum isn’t getting enough nutrients via food/supplementation. 3 years and 4 months of breastfeeding has brought me to the dentist office many times and thankfully I’ve found a holistic dentist who was able to pinpoint where my tooth related pains were coming from.
I’m scheduled for an oral surgery July 31st and I am equally anxious and excited for it. Excited for my health and dental health to be on the up and up — yet not excited for how bloody and painful the week following the operation will be. Yikes!
All this to say, I have completed 3 fillings, and one of my teeth are infected. I need to take antibiotics for 7 days.
I am definitely not a fan of antibiotics as it has wrecked my gut, skin, and health in the past due to overuse. I am disconcerted by how overused/misused antibiotics are but in some circumstances (i.e. certain surgeries) I understand it can be a lifesaver and I have to take it.
During the time I am taking the round of antibiotics, my Doctor advised me to not breastfeed my child. The timing could not be more perfect. We’re down to a couple minutes of breastfeeding a day; she understands why I cannot breastfeed her in the days before & after the surgery; and I’ll have a couple days of childcare (i.e. grandparents) - so I should be able to rest and recover while Emma is cared for!
Life in the slow lane can be Good.
As a mum I am seeing that living “life in the slow lane” is sometimes the wisest and best thing I can do for myself and my relationship with my child.
The other day, I took Emma to the Honolulu Zoo and loved that one of the most intelligent animals on earth also prioritize Life in the slow lane.
An orangutan mother is solely responsible for teacher her youngsters everything it needs to know to survive on it’s own. Youngsters are not weaned until age 7.
- Honolulu Zoo on Orangutans
In my next post, I’ll be sharing some practical and nutritional tips for how to support a mum throughout her weaning journey.